she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
