You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
