I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
is that a dick in a sweater?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
