people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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