now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
So vagazzling was a success
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize