He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I would fuck him just for his dog
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
