and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
