My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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