In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
