I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
