I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
