They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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