If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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