how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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