Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize
