She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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