Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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