Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
