Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
