so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
