I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
