So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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