new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
