I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
