Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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