You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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