Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize