If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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