Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
