I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
