so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
