Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
