margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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