god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
