ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
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