We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Randomize
