Fine. I'll sleep in my office
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
