if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Welp...herpes.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize