walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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