my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
