You really coming over, don't trick.
i think my mom watched the whole time
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
