lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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