He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
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