OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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