Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Do vagina's smell?
is wine microwaveable?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize