We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Randomize
