It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
