Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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