thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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