So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
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