Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
