Kiss
Puke
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
